Several years ago, Terry and I were dealing with what (at the time) seemed like an impossible situation to maneuver. When talking with my sister-friend Alice about it, she asked me, “Do you want peace or do you want to be right?” Trouble was, I wanted both.
Terry and I began our alarm praying from this ordeal. You see, every hour, I set an alarm to go off, and we would stop whatever we were doing, and pray together. Even if I was at the grocery store and Terry was at home working, I would text him, “Time to pray.” The situation was not resolved the way we hoped it would be, but Terry and I drew so much closer to one another, because of it.
Alice’s words rang so true, and they have carried us many times when we are in difficult situations or around difficult people. Terry and I have had to be around some people who have chosen arrogance over kindness; hate over love. Meanness over civility. Each time, I so desperately want to call them out on it, and ask them how others are supposed to see the love of Jesus when their actions and words show, otherwise?
I know I’m right about this. Jesus tells us to love. Period. But if I were to put on my holier than thou jeans, and buckle up in front of them to declare being “right,” I’m just as guilty of being what irks me about their behavior. Sometimes being right isn’t right. Meaning it isn’t always the right thing to do, to prove we are right.
So I have to pray for them, and for my attitude when I have to be around them. Bob Goff tells us to love everybody always, and start with the difficult people. Blech. I don’t always enjoy a challenge.
But I’ll do anything for my Jesus. And I keep coming back to this same verse, over and over: “Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” - John 13:35 (NLT)
If correcting someone is not done in pure love, I don’t want to do it. Putting people “in their place” is not worth it, if it lessens the image of Jesus we are trying to reflect. Even if we know in our guts we are right and they are wrong … sometimes being right isn’t right.